To The World (if you get the hint)

Sometimes you just gotta say screw it. This is who I am and if you ain't rockin with me then that's your loss. Not mine. I'm not even gonna edit this post. This is gonna be my thoughts just as they are in the order they come in. Read it and weep. Or rejoice. 

I cannot explain how the looks of disappointment I get from some of the closest people to me affect me. Or used to affect me. Feeling like I'm not good enough. Not smart enough. Religious enough. Interesting enough. Lovable enough. And to be honest I still feel like shit about it sometimes when I see people looking at me like "damn you changed", but at the same time if you ain't changing then you're not growing up. Yea I'm not who I am when I was 18. And guess what? That's cuz I'm NOT 18 anymore, so why do people expect me to stay the same? 

My parents say I'm not as "good" as I used to be. My friends think I'm not as happy. My siblings don't look at me the same. I don't look at me the same. For the longest time I tried to fix myself. Make myself something I'm not so that the people around me don't have to be disappointed every time they look at me. Like Nahla why don't you wear hijab like you used to? Nahla why don't you laugh like you used to? Why ain't you talking like you used to?

My answer? Cuz I used to do the shit people wanted to see, either it was my parents or siblings or whoever else was influencing me. Now I'm doing me and I don't needa do nothing more than that. My values stay the same. My core beliefs have stayed the same and probably will unless there's overwhelming evidence against them. My sky is still blue, people just seeing different clouds now. 

After realizing that I'm good how I am, and that improving doesn't have to mean changing to please others, I realized what I wanna live for. I want to dedicate my life to fighting for other people's right to be who they truly are. Especially women and young girls. We as a gender have been pressured to fit so many societal standards. A woman is never good enough, so society says. Not skinny enough but not curvy enough. We're not smart enough. Not religious enough. Not proper enough. Not sexy enough. Not wearing enough clothes. Not showing off our bodies enough. It's like we ain't ever good enough and we're always missing an element that would make us better. And even when we grab ahold of that element we gotta shoot for another higher star so we can keep up with the standards society sets. 

My opinion on that is simply "fuck society". I don't care if my whole life is a war against unrealistic standards and looks of disappointment. I will be who I want to be. Who my heart and mind lead me to be. If the people around me can't trust that who I want to be is good enough then that's their problem I guess. I am done living my life in the never ending cycle of pleasing others. I am done skewing my beliefs to fit what the people around me believe to be "right" and I wanna see other women and men living up to THEIR standards and living based off of THEIR beliefs and not those of others. 

That will be my message. 

C'est tout et #respecttheriot ✌️

How 9/11 Affects Muslims

Sept. 11, 2001. All of us know what happened that day. Many, if not all of us can recall exactly what we were doing and where we were when news broke that we had been attacked on our soil. I, for one, was a confused first-grader sitting at lunch when teachers suddenly rounded us up on buses, telling us we were going home early. I remember getting home that day and watching the news with my parents on CNN. I remember hearing my dad call my uncle in Brooklyn to see if his family was safe. I remember the events that followed 9/11 that have not only shaped American relations with the Middle East, but have made being Muslim a target of suspicion.

It’s easy to see the effect that extremism and so-called religiously backed violence has on Western nations, but it sometimes escapes the focus of many that Muslims, whether we are living in the West or elsewhere in the world, have been greatly affected as well. Extremists don’t just target non-Muslim countries; they also attack and kill Muslims who get in the way of their sick ideology. A Muslim who doesn’t support their horrendous acts is as much of a target as any other person.

In fact, terrorists groups have attacked and killed more Muslims than they have any other faith group. Not only do terrorist groups kill Muslims, but they also stand in the way of their respective countries’ advancement and security. For example, as much as the Taliban is hated in the U.S., it has done much more harm to Afghanistan and has affected the lives of many Afghans.

Individuals like Malala Yousafzai, the Afghan girl who was shot by the Taliban for speaking in defense of the education of women, show that Muslims are in fact targeted by extremist militants. The acts of terrorist groups have also had an indirect effect on Muslims. Many Muslim civilians have been killed in the war against terror, while those of us in the West have dealt with racism in one form or the other.

Extremism is not only a physical threat to the lives of many Muslims, but it also affects many of us psychologically. As a Muslim, I’ve grown tired of defending my religion and the rest of my community as a result of the acts of a senseless and ignorant minority. It seems as though Muslims cannot be just Muslim individuals; rather, we are all spokespeople for one another in a way that members of other faith groups don’t have to be. It’s as if being Muslim makes you a lawyer defending all other Muslims, or a prosecutor condemning the acts of those who deviate to the path of religious radicalism. The focus always turns to Muslims as if it’s each one of our responsibilities to condemn criminals, whether it’s by speaking out against al-Qaida or now the Islamic State (formerly ISIS). The racism many Muslims in the West face is also psychologically straining and creates a sense of self-hate among the younger generation, as if it has become shameful to be a Muslim in the 21st century.

So as another Sept. 11 goes by, let’s also keep in mind the Muslims who have had to pay for the acts of terrorism and been the target of radicalism. Three thousand Americans, including American Muslims, died as a result of the Sept. 11 attacks, with countless others dying as a result of the war against terror and the many acts of terror that followed and continue to occur to this day. The least we can do is commemorate the victims of radicalism equally.

Published by The Breeze, James Madison University's student run newspaper:

http://www.breezejmu.org/opinion/article_971d900c-3944-11e4-b55b-0017a43b2370.html