The Anchor

You're the truth my soul yearns for

The anchor these storms need

My moods like violent waves

My mind like weeds in the breeze 

I close my eyes imagining

Your presence in times of despair

When there's nothing left but quietly whispered prayers 

I kneel in weakness

To be delivered with divine strength

Warm tears slowly crawling down my face

I hope this connection never phases out

That this signal never fades

And no matter where the waves take me

I'm still protected by your embrace 

I've failed to conjure the words needed

To fully explain my love for you

For through the anger, the doubt and distrust

You've never walked away

Through my ignorance and young negligence 

Through my pride and insolence 

Through many questions and apparent dissonance 

Still in my picture you've stayed

Still on my heart you lingered

Still my soul for you reached

Only to find warm open hands

Never once have I been turned away

Never once did my sins on my spirit weigh

Without your hands lifting me up

Removing the burden I've failed to carry 

When all is said and done

No matter where life takes me

And where death finds my last living day

To you I pray

My Lord to you I pray 

Out Loud

Caught up in society's madness

Uncontrollable love for freedom

I sit beneath this tree thinking of a time I'll be able to breathe without guilt

That maybe the movement of my chest while I inhale and exhale has disturbed the peace

They told me I want to be too free

That a free woman is nothing but trouble

That I'm that trouble and the path I walk is one undesirable by "the culture"

As if freedom is a threat and their life is what's on the line

"You won't get married

This path leads to Hell

God is angry at you

Your mother and your father too

Walk the way you do and you'll give them reason to rape you

Is this what freedom means to you?"

Words I hear and try to ignore

But these words are like sticks and stones

Pins and needles slowly bursting my bubble and killing my vibe

Fear the status quo

Conform to their standards

Tribe mentality 

Survival of the most silent

But I am loud

I think out loud

I dance out loud

I riot out loud 

I don't tread quietly

Never have and never will

  

I love you woman

I love you woman

Love the way your moods swing from branch to branch 

Free from faking stability

Independently insane and forever passionate

Like flames you give light while burning away

I love you woman

Love the way your tears trickle down your face whether it be in sorrow or in joy

If trickle down economics worked the same way 

Well let's just say there'd be more trickling and less down

I love you woman

Love the way your insecurities blossom into confidence 

Like an ebb and flow of courage 

It's ok to be weak sometimes but you still push through hard times to reach bravery's shore 

Wanting to sun bathe in soft sands of self respect

I love you woman

Love the way you look yourself in the mirror trying to perfect each lash with that mascara wand 

Walking out knowing you still not perfect but you slay anyway because hell,

Ain't nobody perfect but God and since He created you, you got some perfection in your soul

I love you woman

Love your mistakes

Those many human errors that lace the path of your life 

You walk right through them though cuz nothing or no one has the right to stop you from going where you need to be

You keep learning from each slip up cuz you believe each step makes a difference 

I love you woman 

Love your fragile heart and stubborn mind

The fire in your soul that bejewels your crown 

The patience through the pain 

The questions you ask God 

Like "why me?" but you know better than to lose faith because He who created you will never forget your presence 

I love you woman

Love how you want to change the world but find it difficult to change yourself

Seems like all the love you have is directed at everyone except what you see in your reflection

One of the reasons you find causes to fight for is cuz you're tired of fighting for yourself 

You want something bigger than your own ego, pride and dignity

Bigger than life 

I love you woman

Love the confusion your brain struggles with as you try to answer "who am I?"

How you long for acceptance through romanticism 

You want a man who'll love all of you and not just some of you

A man who'll help you carry the weight on your shoulders and dry your tears after stressful days

I love you woman

Love how you want kids of your own one day but you've taught yourself to accept the fact that God might have different plans

So you never rule adoption out the picture because what's the difference between one child and the other?

A smile is a smile anyway and holding a child's hand will always feel the same no matter the womb it has exited from

I love you woman

I love you but I forgot to love myself

Love each woman and the struggles She comes with but I have yet to love myself the same

Feeling shackled and chained by perceptions I can't control

Wanting acceptance from others I forgot to accept myself so when I say 

"I love you woman"

I am unable to add myself into that equation

So insecurity still lingers on days where I feel defeated and rejected 

Needing a poem to come hold my hand just to let me know the most important thing...

I love you woman.